It's been a long and probably well deserved break for me. I'm back, rather, I'm supposed to be back at work. This is what I keep telling my mind all the time. But taking commands is not something I'm quite used to, neither is my mind.
This year kickstarted with a lot of changes. Everyday a new change unfolds itself, forcing me to throw away my comfort zones, my comfortable, complacent self whom I knew so well into a spiral of anonymity. No, I've not doped. I've had my share of sleep and saying I'm stressed wouldn't be true either. It's just that I'm taking my time to soak it all in. I'm taking my time to get used to the constant changes unfolding in front of me.
Change #1 - Bespectacled to Boho Chic
I finally got my surgery done. I'm still taking my time to get used to the fact that I do not need to wear my red rimmed specs anymore. I don't need to undergo the hassle of wearing lenses every morning. I can see well with my naked eyes. Too bad, my different colored lenses are a waste now. Moreoveer, the doc asked me to stay away from eye makeup for another one month. Result? I look dead without kajal...as a person at work commented today morning. Too bad, she is right.
Change #2 - Classroom to Cubicles
I'm constantly reminding myself that I'm done with my fair share of studying. At least for the time being. I get out of my home everyday. Only to go to an office rather than college. Studies over, slogging is about to commence. I'm somewhere in the middle. Still an intern.
Change #3 - Dreams to Dread
As I type this, I'm sitting in the Times of India ka office. This is a place where I'd always wanted to be. The place is HUGE. The facilities are endless. The work as an intern is almost next to none. This place is way better than my college. Anyhow, the fact that it's an office makes my stomach churn. Logically speaking, this is my fifth work place in the last four years (I was always working, even through college) and though it is by far, the most beautiful, biggest, sexiest office where I've worked till now, I'm not liking it here.
I'm afraid I'm bored of offices already. Alright, I want to work. But I really don't want to spend the majority of my life, sitting in a cubicle, murdering my lil bit of social life too. Guess you can't have your cake and eat it too!
Change #4 - Kadki to K-Ching
Yeah, this is the only change that I 'm really happy about. I'm no longer broke. I will be paid for my internship in the months to come. Besides the freelance projects keep my hands full. All the time. I can finally spend as much as I want to. On whatever I want to. Yes, I feel empowered. Considering the shopholic I am, I ought to. I mean, come on, I just got myself a new phone, bought shitty expensive stuff which I'm still wondering if I'll wear or not and still managed to save quite a few grands. I likes!
Change # 5 - Chaotic to Calm
I'm finally at peace...or shall we say, this is the highest stage that I've reached so far in this game called "Chuck Chaos, Catch Calmness". :p
I screamed at my sis only twice in the last week, threw tantrums in front of bf and dad/mom hardly three times and didn't feel like slapping anyone. Wow. I'm improving.
Change # 6 - Frustrated to Free
Yes, I'm free now. No, not with that fattening pack of chips. I'm free as in I'm no longer burdened with work. In fact, there is hardly any work to do. So much so, that I even manage to finish all my freelance projects in the office itself. Just that I'm not free to go out and roam around. But the work stress is definitely gone.
Yes, you can send in your sweater to be knitted. Seriously, I'm that velli. Might as well do it here. Charges? Only Rs 100 per minute. :P
P.S - I never slap anyone. Never have. Never will. It's just that urge which I have mastered to control.
Change is inevitable - except from a vending machine ~ Robert C. Gallagher
There is a lot of stuff about me which even the closest of my pals don't know about. Random stuff, such as I keep imagining how would my sister react when I run away for a world trip from home (which is never going to happen *wink*). Everybody has some random details which are not worth telling to others. I had one such random detail, hmm, online secret, should we say, about me. I loved this particular blog...
I can't recall how I came across this blog for the first time. But I'd been hooked ever since. I never marked it in the following list or blog roll and all that jazz. And still I used to visit it everyday, hoping for a new post. So much so, that the name of her blog became the password for my lappy. There are things which tend to stick with you. Her words were one of them. The reason why I loved this blog so much was precisely because the author of the blog was exactly my age. Blogging for her seemed to be a refuge from the world around her. She was from Constitución, i suppose. She never posted anything very specific about her life, just random ponderings and thoughts. Her thoughts were exactly like mine. Only that she cared enough to post them. I didn't. It was fun going to someone else's blog and reading your own thoughts. A frequent blogger she is.
Sadly enough, she has not posted in a long time now. And I'm scared. I have this stupid, stupid premonition that she is not well or something. She lived in the town which suffered the maximum damage in the recent earthquake to have hit 53 countries. While working, while studying, I keep wondering what she would be doing right now. Is she all right? If she is, why isn't she posting something? I can't comment or get in touch since she'd always disabled comments on her blog. She might wouldn't even know that I exist on other side of the globe. And she hasn't posted anything since the quake.
I know I think way too much. I know I should better worry about thousand other things in my life which are not right. I know she might be plain busy or not in a mood to post anything. But it's been quite some time now and it's strange because she used to post everyday. E.V.E.R.Y.D.A.Y
I'm not selfish or waiting for her post to kill my boredom. I just hope she is alright.
We have been taught to believe that negative equals realistic and positive equals unrealistic ~ Susan Jeffers