Are you ready to do it?

There are certain things I never talk about on my blog.......Sex is one of them. For some strange reason, I believe I have never really felt the need to write a post on it. There is too much of it around us already. Internet is brimming with it. Films portray it. English songs are literally pregnant with suggestive lyrics, People have it (in their minds). But there is one thing which has left me wondering pretty much and I can't help myself but write about it.

I came across this article in a prominent fashion magazine about what is the right time to do it? I was intrigued by the title and thus, gave it a read. Initially, I thought Why does one need to write an article on it? It's a damn personal decision. To each, his own.
It was only that I finished reading it that I was left bemused, astounded and left thinking. The statistics in the article said that according to a survey, Indians stand last in line when it comes to losing their virginity. Most Indians generally do it when they are 19-24 age as compared to Americans where standard age is 13-18 and Europeans who get their cherries popped latest by 17.

Truly, India in 21st century is America of the 60's where talking about sex is still taboo. We, Indians are quite an hypocritical lot too. If a man does it before marriage, he's a stud while a woman is branded a whore. Needless to say, Indian women are forced to adopt a hypocritical approach to the issue of sex altogether. Mothers teach their daughters to abstain from it till marriage because if a guy is getting the milk for free, why would he bother buying the cow?

The scenario in few metropolitan cities might be a bit different and liberated but I'm discussing about the state of affairs in India (with all its villages and small towns included). To quote the massive difference between the thinking of two genders, Here is a snippet of confessions I read in the magazine.

An Urban guy who was interviewed - I can't wait to relieve myself of this burden of virginity. The maximum I can wait is till 22 years old. The sooner I lose it, the better. (truth be told, this is the viewpoint of most of my male friends too. no exaggerations).

An urban female - No, I think I'll like to wait till I get married. There are other important things like career, education bla bla bla. But reasons for staying a virgin by this certain 24 year old , unmarried girl really impressed me. When asked didn't she felt that she was losing out on something by remaining a virgin while all her friends are doing it? She answered "Oh sure, would you like to know what all am I losing out on?
  • I'm missing out on worrying every month if I'm pregnant
  • I'm missing out on lying to my parents and leading a double life.
  • I'm missing out on getting up morning after and worry if my bf would dump me or if he would marry me at all and when?
What really shocked me was when this male friend of mine confessed that he won't wait till marriage to lose his virginity. However, when asked if he would like to marry a non-virgin, he flatly refused! And said that no man would accept a girl if she had had serious flings before. Wow!!!!. I wondered whom did he intend to lose his virginity to? To a pros? coz every other respectable girl would lose her chances of getting married by helping him to "relieve him of his burden".

One of the popular reality show on Star plus projected a 30 year old man saying he preferred to marry a 21 year old contestant as compared to other older girls as her chances of being chaste were far more. Woohoo.

Priyanka Chopra is seen admitting losing her heart and virginity to a neighbor who later dumped her in a film, What's your Rashee. Why did she said that? Was it really that important? Did she really think that her future NRI husband was a Mr. goody two shoes with no sexual past???

Young girls are always taught that Virginity is dignity. I wonder then why the hell are Adolescent Indian boys and young men are so eager to lose their dignity.
Frankly, I still believe in the traditional concept. It is better to wait for the right person or till you get married before you indulge in the never-to-be repeated act. And do not end up regretting it. Like I earlier said, To each, his own. Some say that these worries are only in mind while sex is a purely natural and physical act. But isn't sex all in the mind? Alas.


VaiDHei ChiTLanGiA | October 6, 2009 at 5:15 PM

hmmmm...muaaah i luvd it...
sexy reality to the core...
i love the way u put it with facts and truths....
must read for alll indian boys especially......
keep up the gud wrk....

Umesh Agarwal | October 6, 2009 at 5:22 PM

your post is oozing with truth..I believe Indian society is the most hypocritical in this world..keep writing :)

Abhinav | October 6, 2009 at 9:07 PM

OMG I m the first one to comment! I hope my parents do not read this blog and this comment specially!
(Some Urban boys comment this way as well!)

hehe.. frankly i don't discuss Education, sex (and no career) in public.. but yeah facts may not say it but its true.. every second male will not say no if he gets a chance!

Who gives them chance though is again a matter of discussion!

The Crystal Heart | October 6, 2009 at 11:23 PM

Genius Angel Seriously This Is Your Master Piece Of Writting....You Know Very Well How To Expressed Your Feeling In Words....Thats The Biggest Reason I Am Always Reading Your Famous Blog....

I Am Not Eager to lose My Dignity.
Frankly, I Am Trying To believe in the Traditional Concept....Indeed I Am Monogamist Person......I Am Really Extremely Happy With One Woman Whole Life As My Jaaaaanu Life Partner...That A Good Line To Impressed Girls hehehe lolz....

I'll try 2 be truthful | October 7, 2009 at 12:35 PM

oh bohot socha hai tune is bare me .

once upon a time mainen bhi socha tha and was similarly scandalised by "why can guys do it without having a sceond thought and girls ko to like mana hai "

u didnt need to ask an urban male , mtv roadies auditions has such namoonas (to which raghu replies " matlab if ur gf does it with u, u wont marry her coz she"ll be a non virgin, ass*ole")

my thoughts concurred with raghu that one time .

personally i feel V is overhyped ( nahi to statistics kyu banate ?)

ps: u saw wyr??????? cancerian wali ne kaha na ye? i'm a cancerian too ,i wish they had showed her differently .

peter | October 8, 2009 at 5:31 AM

Ahem ahem !

Well, see here's a thing.. A few people say.. "having sex is like touching someone, however for the 1st time it wud be sensitive"

Now Personally I agree and disagree to this weird saying.

Agree: Coz I don't feel losing virginity is a big deal before marriage or at an early age ..for anyone, irrespective of the gender and if he/she doesn't regret it later.

Disagree: coz Just touching wouldn't result in pregnancy any day.

You can try mechanically evolving everything in an individual, except the mentality, that's always there by birth I say !

PinkLovesParis | October 11, 2009 at 10:50 AM

Priyanka, this is a post that I was WAITING FOR. Someone really needed to broach and explore the subject and I am glad you did!

Sadly the state of affairs is true, even in Pakistan. Men can do as they please and women need to remain chaste. While I am not against the idea of remaining a virgin till marriage because of all the reasons that girl listed, I am against the blatant disparity and hypocrisy our societies display - parents do not rip theor hair out when they find out their son has been 'naughty', it's always the girl.

Prianca | October 12, 2009 at 10:29 AM

@ vaidhei
thank you so much for ol d appreciation. ;)

@ umesh
well, not the most but indian society is definitely ONE of the most hypocritical societies in the world. will post about some other countries too.

Prianca | October 12, 2009 at 10:31 AM

@ abhinav
jhooth mat bolo. u do discuss your career in your blog. although not any more. remember, satyam placements ? (no offence, it is a cheap tactic to remind you that i follow all your posts) ;))

@ crystal heart
she must be a lucky gal. thnx :)

Prianca | October 12, 2009 at 10:34 AM

@ i'll try to be truthful
yup, true. virginity is an overrated virtue.
thanku dear. i was glad to read your comment. all i cud say was echo echo echo. ;)

@ peter
alas, only if all the indian males were as broad minded as you are. hihi. btw, loved the last line of your comment.

Prianca | October 12, 2009 at 10:36 AM

@ pinklovesparis
firstly, thanku for taking your precious time out and reading the post.
i know we think alike on topics which are particularly pertaining to asian problems. pleasure is all mine dear :)

The Crystal Heart | October 16, 2009 at 12:58 AM

Respected Genius Angel Ji

May This Diwali be as bright as ever.
May this Diwali bring joy, health and wealth to you.
May the festival of lights brighten up you and your near and dear ones lives.
May this Diwali bring in u the most brightest and choicest happiness and love you have ever Wished for.
May this Diwali bring you the utmost in peace and prosperity.
May lights triumph over darkness.
May peace transcend the earth.
May the spirit of light illuminate the world.
May the light that we celebrate at Diwali show us the way and lead us together on the path of peace and social harmony
Troubles as light as Air,
love as deep as Ocean,
Friends as Solid as Diamonds,
and Success as bright as Gold...
These are the wishes for you and your family on the eve of Diwali

menkah!! | November 1, 2009 at 1:22 PM

you write SO damned well, i can see this appearing in some magazine or something. facts+ your views have been nicely interwoven. made a fabulous read !!

thanks for writing this!
agree with your viewpoints. i feel men who go taking "dignity" of women and then call them un-marriable should be castrated!